Christmas Greetings

To Everyone who visits my BLOG...

I wish you and your families a Very MERRY CHRISTMAS and a Safe, Prosperous and Blessed NEW YEAR!

Love and Reincarnation

Yesterday, my sister, Pam, picked me up from work since she was on her way home from accompanying our Grandmother. We had to pass by the Alabang Town Center to pick up some baked goodies that our Mom ordered from the Ilustrado. Since it was still quite early, I invited my sister to watch a movie at the Cinemas of the Alabang Town Center.

There are only 5 Cinemas at the ATC, so our choices were limited. I wasn't in any mood to watch The Polar Express or National Treasure, nor was I even minutely interested in watching Bridget Jones: The Edge Of Reason. I was left with no choice but to watch Nicole Kidman's Movie, Birth.

I admired and saw several movies of Nicole Kidman, and each time, she never ceases to amaze me. This movie is not an exception. It was one of her "different" movies. It wasn't as "Commercial" as Commercial Movies go. It had soul and depth. Most importantly, it made me think.

Could Love really transcend Time, Space and the After-Life? Could Love ever be that strong? Could one truly believe in a Love that Reincarnates through another person who can easily pass as your child? How would I handle such a situation? Would I choose to dwell in a previous, but enduring Love, or would I move on and Love another?

The movie was unlike any Dramatic or Romantic Movie I have seen. It was laced with a shady, dark mood. The usual heaviness of a Drama, and the etherealness of a Romantic Movie is shrouded by a sense of doubt, uncertainty, hesitancy and even absurdity. And yet you can definitely feel a slight tug in your heart, that urges you to believe that the Love between the Young Sean (Cameron Bright) and Anna (Nicole Kidman) is real. And that the Young Sean, is the REAL Reincarnation of Anna's beloved Husband, Sean.

Birth is also unlike most Commercial Movies that build up on the plot and follows this up with an explosive and definitive climax. Birth leaves you wanting more, concluding the film with an Open Ending, without giving a definite closure to the storyline.

My sister and I had different interpretations and views on the movie. We were even arguing on the ending, since we both had different evaluations on how the story closed.

The story, the plot and the questions still linger in my mind. The "What If's" still floats in my subconscious. Answers to the questions may forever stay unanswered, but who knows?

I Am Back

Yes, folks! Elaine is back after almost 2 months on hiatus.

In these last few weeks, I haven't had a single inspiration or motivation that would urge me to write an entry. Nothing.

Of course there were lots of things that have happened to me since my last entry. It would be extremely odd if there weren't any. Work, obviously, kept me busy and sane. It takes up 85% of my time. The other 15% was spent sleeping or in the deranging traffic.

Some changes have happened during my absence from this BLOG. A change of Workspace at the office, a change on my Body Clock, a slight change of outlook in life... Slight changes that keeps me going without having the monotony of routine. Some are very petty, some even materialistically trivial.

There is, basically, nothing interesting to write about in my life right now, save for these menial changes, which are really insignificant to begin with.

My next entry will contain the inspiration and reason for my return to being a Blogger.

Easy Lasagna

To those who tried my Easy Vermicelli, here's another recipe that you might like. I chanced upon it while I was craving for some Mouthwatering Pasta dishes.

I was hooked on the Greenwich Lasagna. It was one of the cheesiest and meatiest lasagnas I have ever tried in my life! It's also very tasty. It was not tangy, salty or bland... It was just right!

One day, I couldn't get a hand on an order of Lasagna. I started to research on how to cook lasagna the easy way.

Those in the know can attest that Lasagna is one of the hardest Pasta dishes to cook/bake. You have to prepare a cheese sauce, the meat sauce and, of course, cook the noodles! In addition to cooking, you have to bake the whole thing!

Well, I got just the recipe for you! It's easy in the sense that you need not slave for hours in the kitchen. But the cooking and baking is still there.

Here it is, folks! My own take on a very tasty, cheesy and delicious Lasagna!

- o O o -

LASAGNA

Ingredients:
Lasagna Noodles
1 Large Can Hunt's Spaghetti Meat Sauce (or you can also use Hunt's Italian Sausage Spaghetti Sauce)
1/4 kilo Ground Beef
1 Small Onion, chopped
1 Tetra Pack, All Purpose Cream
1 Container Magnolia Cottage Cheese
Quickmelt Cheese, grated
Mozzarella Cheese, grated

Directions:
1. Cook Lasagna Noodles according to package directions, until al dente. Drain, separate and set aside.

2. Saute Onions until transparent. Add Ground Beef and cook until the Ground Beef is golden brown. Add salt and pepper according to your taste. Drain the excess fat. Add the Spaghetti Meat Sauce and let it simmer for 5-10 minutes.

3. In a separate container, combine All Purpose Cream, Cottage Cheese, Quickmelt Cheese and Mozzarella Cheese. Mix until well blended.

4. Preheat oven to 345 Degrees Fahrenheit.

5. In a glass pan, layer the Sauces and Noodles in this order: Lasagna Noodles, Meat Sauce and Cheese Sauce, repeat as needed. Top with Grated Mozzarella Cheese.

6. Cover pan with Aluminum Foil and bake for 45 minutes-1 hour.

- o O o -

It's actually very easy. After you layer the lasagna noodles, the meat sauce and the cheese sauce, the only "work" you will do is putting the pan into the oven. That's it.

And this is my guarantee... Everyone will love it! My friends and colleagues loved my lasagna! It wasn't greasy (because I drained the fat), bland, sweet, or too spicy. The taste was just right because of the Canned Spaghetti Sauce. You really don't need to put additional spices because the Hunt's Spaghetti Sauce has just the right amount of spices.

You can also substitute some of the Cheeses with other economical Cheese Alternatives. You may use Kesong Puti, your regular grocery Processed Cheese, or whatever cheese you'd like (except Blue Cheese or sour cheeses, of course!).

Hope you like my new recipe. I will try to share more if time permits. Enjoy!

Kids, Issues & Being A Kid

Wow! It's been more than 3 weeks since I last updated my BLOG! That's a long time! I'm so sorry, to those who frequent my BLOG. Nothing much was happening in the last few weeks, and I didn't want to fill my BLOG with all the drama and negative things that were happening in my life.

Well, now, I have lots of things to write. I have had a lot of things happen in the last week that I just can't wait to share. But of course, I have to edit out things that are quite sensitive... Hehe!

First of all, I saw my nephew again!!! Yep! He's such a looker! He's just such a darling! Matty is growing up so fast! He's only about 4 months old, but he's a big guy! He's a sweetheart! His big, beautiful eyes just glisten with innocence and love! I can't wait to see him again!

I saw Matty during our family's mini-outing in Laguna last Saturday, October 16. It was my little cousin, Izabella's, 6th birthday. It was one of those events where we would just hang out, pig out, go out, etc. We'd see relatives we hardly ever see, and just enjoy each other's company. It's just like those old times when the whole clan gets together. It's such a fun experience.

In addition to the event being a fun experience, I also had the chance to have some R&R. It's so nice to get away from the city and just enjoy the mountainside. Although there was much commotion around, I was so happy that I was able to take a couple of restful naps. It was pure bliss!

Another event last Saturday Evening, that I quite enjoyed, was the get-together of my friends from RV Land. It was so nice to see them again. I just love exchanging conversations with some of them. I love the cheerful and jovial banter we all share! The way we would joke around just livens up my spirits (though we already got there around 11:30PM!).

That event, however, did not end well. There was a really big issue that was brought up in the wee hours of the morning. All the hollering and bawling woke those who were already peacefully asleep (myself, included). That is the sensitive issue that I mentioned I was omitting. It's just complicated.

Anyway, the week went on with nothing but that issue as a Hot Topic of discussion among my friends, my sister and myself. I'm glad that, though the issue was quite sensitive and somewhat damaging to the group, the group gets together more often because of it.

Last night, most of our friends stayed over in our house, after the taping of Regine Velasquez's Soap Opera, "Forever In My Heart." They're all leaving, together with my sister, for Lucena City, where Regine Velasquez will be having a concert. It's a long drive from our place to Lucena (about 3-4 hours), but I am sure that they'll all have a great time, like we had this morning!

This morning was just the best! It was like being a kid again! You see, we lost our water supply this morning, and the only way we could bathe was if we did it in our backyard, under the Water Tank. And guess what? There were 6 of us taking a bath in our backyard!!! Picture little kids enjoying the water on an open Fire Hydrant or Garden Sprinklers... That was exactly how we looked like! Hahaha! It was fun! Of course, we were fully clothed while taking a bath (I wore my 2-piece bathing suit)! We have no plans of becoming exhibitionists, even if our perimeter walls were high enough to cover us from the streets! It was so fun!

I mentioned the taping of "Forever In My Heart." Well, I was also there. For those who don't know me quite well, I have a certain grievance against Regine Velasquez, which I do not care to elaborate. I might get reprimanded again by those people who hover around her. (There goes the Right of Free Speech, out the window and down the drain!!!)

Anyway, I went along with my sister, because I know our friends will be there and that we'll be able to rant about the issue again. It kinda helps release the building tension inside when we talk about it and rant some more. I really enjoyed that. We also got to see another friend who does not really hang out with us, but is still considered as a part of the group. It's just so nice to be with them again, though they were there for Regine.

I love being a kid. And being with my little cousins and some friends made me feel like one! Oh joy! Here's to being a kid for a time!

25 Going On 13

My sister, Pam, and I just saw Jennifer Garner's movie, 13 Going On 30. It was a pretty hilarious movie, and it really made an impact on me.

I have had multitudes of experiences in my life that I wish, somehow, I could forget. Some things that I regret having experienced at all. I even found myself looking back on those specific instances that I wish never occured. I thought of how I could've handled things differently. How it would've affected my life, had I done things in another way.

But you can never undo what has been done. Unless you have those mystical Wishing Powder, like the one that Matt gave to Jenna, in the movie.

If I had a pack of that Wishing Powder, I would go back to my days in 6th Grade. I would've studied harder, rather than just hangout with my Bandmates. I would've been accelerated to High School. But then again, I wouldn't have met my First Boyfriend.

From the 6th Grade, onwards, I would've done things in a lot of different ways. Maybe, I would've been a more educated person. Maybe, I would've taken Law or another profession. Who knows?

So, I pray to God that I can get a hold of a working "Wishing Dust."

Buzz Off

I had a great weekend just this week. I had nothing more to ask for, and I was content. Honestly, I was even quite relieved to have it over with. It was a tiring weekend, but it was well worth it. I was happy, and that was all that mattered.

But certain people just had to burst that contentment bubble I was in. People who want to ruin other people's day, just for fun.

First, one of my colleagues just had to share that he had a run-in with a ghost, here in our work area, just yesterday. And he knows I am petrified of those stories and experiences. To make matters worse, we were on Graveyard Shift!!!

After he told his story, another colleague just found it essential to rub in the ghost situation by joking about it. They already knew I was scared to my wit's end, and they just had to push my buttons. My Team Leader noticed that I was somewhat pissed, so we tried to talk about it during our weekly PEP Talks. I told her that I did not appreciate having people push the wrong buttons and just continue pushing, as if nothing was wrong with it. How INSENSITIVE can these people get?!?

And just about an hour, or so, ago, another colleague was simply very eager to push me over the edge with uncalled for sarcasm.

That person feels very comfortable in insulting me in jest. He likes doing that to everyone. Just because he thinks everyone likes the way he jokes around, he thinks I can appreciate it as well. At first, I didn't mind because I like this person. He was fun to be with. But as time wore on, his attacks became more sarcastic, more personal and more serious. At least his tone was.

So, how was I to interpret it? He also acted like he disliked me whenever he was around my presence. Since his tone and sarcasm became more serious, I had to perceive it to be a REAL attack. I am not, usually, a confrontational person, but I did try to assert my point.

Today, I just had enough. He was accusing me of unjustly picking the Graveyard Shift for next month.* Hello?!? I had to pick a shift the way everyone did... By drawing lots. Was it my fault I got the lot that said Graveyard Shift?!? How dare he accuse me of being unfair in something that was done at Random?!?

Add to that, everyone already noticed how quiet I was when they arrived. I was still tripping from the "Ghost Stories" from the night before, and he just had to flagrantly accuse me of something I did not do. The heck?!?

So, just to put his mind at ease, I circulated an email within our team about swapping my Graveyard Shift with another. After I sent the email out, he came out with HIS own email circulation saying something about being "mature" about taking jokes. He's talking about being mature?!? Why not talk about being SENSITIVE for a while, huh?!? Jeeze!

After all I've been through with his below-the-belt sarcasm and joking, I will not take any of his crap anymore. Unless he becomes more sensitive to others, his sarcasm is not welcome, be it in jest or not. I just hope, against hope, someone slaps him with the realization that not everyone appreciates his sarcastic remarks, even if they are done jokingly. Because, in the first place, everyone knows that jokes are really half meant!

___________________________

* Our team changes Shift Schedules every month.

Spectacular Spectacles

Let me start this entry with my MSN Messenger Display Name: "My Future Is So Bright, I Broke My Glasses!"

That was my own OPTIMISTIC way of looking at this catastrophe.

If you know me well enough, you'd know that I am dependent on my Glasses.

I have had Myopia (Near-Sightedness) since my early years in Elementary. By the time I stepped into High School, I was extremely helpless without my Glasses. With the high negativity of my eyes' lenses, I'm essentially blind without my eyeglass.

And today, of all the days, the frame of my eyeglass broke. It was a 3-year old Titanium Frame, which I bought with my First Month's Salary from PeopleSupport. It was my bestfriend for 3 years. I read with it, drove with it, cooked with it, did basically everything with it, even slept with it! Every waking morning, it was the first thing I reached out for. I never open my eyes without my glasses on. The only time I would remove it is when I am in the shower.

The frame broke as I reached for it upon waking this afternoon. The left "arm" snapped off like a dried up twig! Along with the arm, the nylon thread, that held the left lens, also broke. It rendered my glasses utterly useless (except for the right side). For the first time, I panicked! I cannot drive to work without my glasses! I cannot FUNCTION without my glasses! I had to do something!

I remembered that my Aunt and I had agreed to meet to go to the grocery and buy stuff for my Birthday Outing (which was rescheduled from the Original Date) this weekend. I called her and told her the situation. She, then, drove me to SM Southmall to buy a new pair.

On our way to the Mall, I felt extremely dizzy. My eyes could not concentrate on one object. It was as if my eyes were on panic mode. It roamed around, trying to find one clear picture. But, unfortunately, the only objects that I could clearly see were the ones that were half an arm's length away. And the glare of the sun didn't help much. I became car-sick in less than 5 minutes!

Thankfully, I was able to find a great looking pair of eyeglasses from Executive Optical. It had black rims, which made me look more sophisticated and smart. Actually, it made me look like a sophisticated Jessica Zafra. Cool. What I liked most about the new frame was the Clip-On that came with it.

As great as it was, it also came with a great pricetag. Good thing, Executive Optical had a sale. I got it at 25% off, which brought down the price to PhP 2685.00. Still a bit pricey, but if it lasts me another 3 years, it would be well worth it.

I still had another problem. I had to buy lenses for this new frame. I had my eyes refracted while I bought my frames, so I was able to get the prescription. I had to canvass around the mall for the cheapest Ultra-Thin Lenses I could find. Of course, they also had to have my prescription.

Executive Optical sold Ultra-Thin Lenses for PhP 2300.00, but they did not have stocks for my prescription. And I needed them badly! The next best price was with Vision Express. They sold Ultra-Thin Plastic Lenses for PhP 2700.00, and they had available stocks for my prescription. They also were able to fit my lenses to the frame in less than an hour!

Although it made me PhP 5385.00 poorer, nothing will still compare with the great relief I felt when I wore my new specs! It's not because I looked better, but because I had clearer vision. I no longer had to squinch my eyes very hard to focus on things. I no longer had to bump into things and people while walking. AND, I no longer had to get car-sick.

I just wish that one day, I will no longer need eyeglasses to see things better.

Ogie Doggie

A Delectable Journey for the Palate... That was what I experienced early this evening.

If you guys have been reading up on my BLOG, I have intimated that I was a gourmand, or a lover of good food. And I love finding new and interesting places and restaurants to eat from. I have, also, previously written about one of the Philippines' Best Singer/Songwriters, Mr. Ogie Alcasid.

So, what does Ogie Alcasid have to do with my love of food?!? Let me resolve that for you...

I love sausages. Not the Canned Vienna Sausages or those Red Commercialized Hotdogs on the Frozen Foods section you find in your local grocery stores (although, I love having them for breakfast!)... Its those big, succulent, gourmet sausages I am talking about! I used to eat a lot of them when I was in the States. I loved those Polish Hotdogs they sold at Costco and in those Hotdog Carts outside the BART Stations. With some Sauerkraut and Mustard... I'm sold!

Unfortunately, those kinds of sausages are fairly rare here in the Philippines. It's either very expensive, or very tiny (one bite is all it takes!).

What a great relief it was when I learned that my favorite Male Artist was opening a Hotdog Stand here in the Metro!

It wasn't your regular run-of-the-mill hotdog stands, commonly found in the Food Courts here. They sell Premium Gourmet Sausages for a very affordable price! And who better to serve you with these mouth-watering frankfurters than Mr. Songwriter himself?!? What more could a Gourmet Sausage Enthusiast, like me, ask for?!? (Well, maybe a song or two?!? With Sauerkraut on the side! Hehehe! Just kidding!)

This latest venture of Ogie Alcasid is aptly named Ogie Doggie. It's located in the newly-opened market-cum-mall at the Bonifacio Global City, Makati called Market! Market! Just a short distance from the C5 Road, it makes Ogie Doggie very accessible to everyone from the Northern and Southern Metro Manila.

His kiosk/stall is strategically located along the walkway between the mall entrance and the parking lot. The kiosk is quite small, and with the massive number of people going to and fro, you just might miss it. But it is still worth the adventure.

I ordered a Hungarian Sausage and a Polish Hotdog, just for kicks. The Hungarian Sausage was spicy enough to give you a tingly sensation in your mouth. It was juicy and very tasty! Yum! And it was filling enough for you to forget about having a midnight snack! (I am still stuffed from that Hungarian Sausage!!!). The Polish Hotdog is yet to be consumed... Hahaha! I am saving it for later!

Only one thing is missing in this flavorsome journey... The Sauerkraut! They did have Pickle Relish and Onions to cover for it, but my tastebuds were craving for the zest and tang of Sauerkraut. Well, as they say, "You can't have Everything!"

So, if you guys (who live here in Manila) are in the vicinity of the Bonifacio Global City, try the different sausages of Ogie Doggie! It's worth your money! (And the Parking is still FREE!).

Congratulations, again, to Kuya Ogie, for a successful venture! May you have more stores to come!

A Sudden Burst Of Nothing

Okay, nothing much is happening in my life right now. After a tumultuous birthday, a great gray nothingness.

I try to find some things that would be of interest to me, but to no avail. Sleep and boredom seems to be my only companion.

I do try to surf the vastness of the Internet, but I end up yearning to be somewhere else, meeting someone new, befriending someone I've been longing to meet.

Pray tell, what am I to do?

It's MY Birthday!

Hey Everbody! It's MY Birthday! I'm gonna party like it's MY Birthday! I'm gonna sip Bacardi like it's MY Birthday! And I know you don't give a F*CK that it's MY Birthday!

I'm a quarter of a century old today. I don't feel like I've been on this earth that long.

Actually, I don't feel a thing. I feel numb. I feel nothing. Is that a good thing? I don't know.

Lately, I've been quite a pessimist. I feel like everything, and everyone, in my life doesn't give a damn about me. It always happens when my birthdays draw near. I always expect something to go wrong before, during, or after my birthday. Something to destroy the mood of the happiness I should feel on my special day.

This year, a lot of things bother me.

First, I found the courage to let go of something (and someone) that has given me great grief. It wasn't as easy as I thought. I had to muster enough determination to write that person a letter stating all the hurts and heartaches that were brought about by meeting that person. I also indicated in the letter that I have to let go of that person so that I could pick up the pieces of my life that have been shattered by just knowing and following that said person.

Sometimes, anxiety sets in after I've written the kind of letter I gave. It's due to the fact that it is during these letter-giving events where I get burned most often. People around that person tend to misread and misconstrue what they read. In the first place, why are they reading letters that are not addressed to them? And, taking what they can from what they've read, they will start to censure and thrash me.

That's why I decided to get away from these people. I need space to keep my sanity. But I've found some sympathetic support from some true friends, which helps me stand my ground.

Second thing that bothers me is my father's inability to extend a helping hand on my party plans. I mean, I'm not asking him for money, or anything, for my birthday, except to call this one person who owns a private resort in the South of Manila, where I am planning to spend my birthday weekend. But, just a day shy of my weekend plans, he has still not called that person up. I mean... Could he be any more uncooperative? Jeeze!

Third, one of my closest friends, the one I am expecting to come, couldn't. Darnit! She's trapped by schedules of this Grand Career-Making Contest she has entered. To think we've been looking forward to my birthday for the last 4-5 months.

Lastly, it seems like a lot of things in my weekend plans are not working. I've been so busy lately to focus on my birthday weekend. Most of my invited friends have not confirmed, and those who did might, I fear, feel left out since most of the people in my weekend getaway party are from my family. I just hope something works. I hope they don't get bored.

Lord help me!

All I wanna do now is get filthy drunk on my birthday and forget all these nuisances in my life! I need some vodka right now!!! Give me my Bacardi!!!

Struck

The whole day, I've been feeling a bit... I dunno... Hmmm...

It's really very funny. I'm not in-love, nor am I seeing anybody with whom I might share that feeling with. But I feel very queasy and mushy inside. No... I don't feel like going to the bathroom. I just have this inexplicable feeling deep inside. It's messing with my head and messing with my emotions.

Maybe I know what it is...

There's just something about those passionate, green eyes... Drives me nuts! Sometimes I think I am about to melt in that green, abysmal paradise.Why am I so attracted to green-eyed people? What's with it?

And this damn music isn't helping any!!! Damn you, Enya!!! (Just kidding!)

Aaaarrrggghhh!!!

Great Pretender

In this world filled with people displaying their uniqueness and individuality, one can only adapt and adjust, to maintain the harmonious balance of society.

In my entire lifetime, I have met, mingled and sustained friendships with different kinds of people. People with different backgrounds, beliefs, upbringings and personalities. Some friends of mine even display contrasting character traits from my own. But I was able to accommodate and adjust to their personalites, without sacrificing mine. I, almost always, try to accept people for who they are, regardless of the circumstances they are in.

Generally, I am not a pretentious person. I may be obnoxious, brash and effervescent, but never a hypocrite. I will tell you that I don't like you, if I don't. If I cannot bring myself to verbalize it, I will surely make it known to you. I am transparent that way.

And if there is anything in this world that I just loathe in people, it would, definitely, be Pretention and Deceit.

Don't you just hate it when you encounter people who masquerade themselves as your friends, and just flagrantly backstab you at each and every chance they get? I call these kinds people the Great Pretenders.

These Great Pretenders have polished skills in betrayal and duplicity, and operate discreetly right under your nose. When you're present, it would seem as if nothing was wrong and that everything is going well amongst yourselves. But once you've turned to another direction, all hell breaks lose and you will not know what hit you. Such treachery is just so despicable.

There are a number of Great Pretenders in my life, right now. But I don't mind them. I just let them do what they want. As if I give a damn! Hah!

I do pray for these people, though. I pray that God will show them the same mercy that they have failed to show me. And I also pray that God will not pass judgment on them, the way they did me.

You see? In the face of adversity, I still try to look at the brighter side of life. Besides, however these people malign and discredit me, there would always be people who know me better than these Great Pretenders do.

Gotta Tell You

Don’t wanna love you, if you don’t love me
Don’t wanna need you when you won't need me, too
Don’t wanna tell you this now
But it wouldn’t be right if I (if I)
Didn’t tell you this tonight

--- o O o ---

I have been sulking the whole time I'm here in the office today. I am so frustrated about being Romantically Challenged, much like yesterday. I was about to doze off, when Samantha Mumba's song, Gotta Tell You, from the year 2000, started playing on my Computer.

The song has been playing on my Computer everyday for the past few weeks, but only had an impact on me now. It gave me a big whack on the face, which, in a way, shook me off the depressive state I was in.

The Chorus (which appears above), made me realize that if somebody is not willing to reciprocate what you are willing to give and sacrifice, you might as well not give it to them. Find someone who will appreciate it better. Someone who will unconditionally recompense you with the same devotion, respect, and passion that you commit to that person.

Do not be a martyr for love.

A lot of people love me for who I am. Sure, they're basically related to me, but, at least, they love me unambiguously. Although brethren love is different from romantic love, it's still one and the same. It's still love.

If that amorous love continues to shy away, move forward and live on. Find another outlet for the pent-up love that was meant to be given to that elusive beau.

But should it come and present itself, be willing to exchange and share who and what you are with that person. In return, know when and what to accept from him. Learn to compromise and communicate. Try to learn from, and with, each other.

Man! I'm learning more about love than what I am experiencing! Love come quickly!!!

What's Wrong With Me?

Here it is, People!!! My rantings about being Pathetically Single. (Not that I'm in hurry to be in a Relationship).

I have been Single, Unattached, Eligible, Celibate, and what-have-you, for all of the 24 years and 358 days that I have been in existence in this Earth. Never have I been in a "Romantic Relationship" in all those time. Not unless you count all those "Could-Have-Beens" and "Almost-There" Relationships I've been in. Okay, I did have a previous boyfriend. But does it count?

I was in 7th Grade when I first had a Boyfriend (if you could call it that). He was from San Beda College. We had an interaction with their class, and he was my partner. We got to know more about each other during the rehearsals of the Inter-School Play, Ora Et Labora, and on the phone, in between. What's so funny was, he was always jealous. Even of my friends! He also "pressured" me to go steady with him. That summer, I broke it off with him and moved to another school.

Since then, I've never had a Boyfriend. I've had Mutual Understandings with some great guys, but peer pressure prevented me from getting those relationships any further. Don't get me wrong, my friends wanted me to go into a relationship with some of these guys I had an MU with. I just don't want to be pressured into a relationship by my friends. That's why none of my Mutual Understandings flourished.

Another thing... What's with me that makes all the wrong guys fall for me? Some of these guys already have girlfriends but they still try to hit on me. Some were even friends of mine before they took advantage of the situation and almost Sexually Harrassed me. Good thing I know how to defend myself.

I, also, did not try to engage myself in a relationship while I was still in school. I wanted to concentrate on being a student (though I only faired on the Average scale).

But how come now that I am of age, free to fall in love and free to commit myself to someone, I am having such a terrible time having a relationship?

I believe it is because most men have this pre-conceived vision of the person they would like to be in a relationship with. Most often than not, this person is a statuesque model with 36C bosoms and 24-inch waistlines, perfectly sculpted face, athletic bodies complete with washboard abs. The perfect Trophy Girlfriends. Either that, or these men are Gay. But that, my friends, is another story.

Whatever happened to rapport? To chemistry? To personality? No one cares about it anymore. That's why a lot of marriages end up in Divorce, and relationships into break-ups.

People nowadays look at the superficial beauty rather than one's integrity, personality and character. No one cares about how one has been brought up or what their values are. Lust takes over almost immediately.

This is why average-looking women, those who do not fit into the mold of the picture-perfect model, end up single for most of their lives.

I do not want to be a spinster. Absolutely not! But I also do not want to conform to this public pressure to become a slim, almost-anorexic, model-ish woman just to have a man worth my while.

Though I am completely against discriminating someone based on their looks, I must admit that I also have some standards when it comes to men. Nothing so special or hard. They just have to be clean-cut. No grungy, smelly guys. Someone who knows how to clean up nicely. That's it. Other than that, they should be God-fearing and Family-Oriented.

I also have a list of Non-Negotiables when it comes to Men. I learned this from watching Starting Over. These Non-Negotiables will be further discussed on another entry. But these Non-Negotiables have nothing to do with the Physical Attributes of a Man.

Is Physical Attraction really that essential? What will happen to us who are considered as "average-looking" and who do not possess stick-thin bodies? Would we just rot in the "Reject" bins?

A lot of people tell me that they like my personality. That I am a fun person, someone who they can always rely on and be comfortable with. Some of my friends even tell me a lot of different traits that they love about me. But then again, friends always tell you that.

Sigh... What Is Wrong With Me?!? Is there ANYTHING Wrong With Me?!?

A Night To Remember

Last August 31, 2004 I had an unexpectedly great evening. It was the 18th Birthday of Rachelle Ann Go, the Winner, and one of my friends, from Search For A Star.

Initially, I was supposed to attend the event with another friend, and Grand Finalist, from SFAS, Iris Malazarte. But due to the heavy rains (and other personal reasons), she had to back out at the last minute. I was pretty frustrated because I wanted to attend the party, yet I was worried that without Iris, I might get left out.

At the last minute, I decided to go with or without Iris. Despite my hesitations of driving in the pouring rain, I braved the slick roads to get to the Philippine Stock Exchange Center in Ortigas, where the party was to be held.

When I arrived, I summoned all my confidence to go in the Ballroom. Inside, I learned that I was going to share a table with my other friends from SFAS: Grand Finalists Melo Valeña and Camille Relevo. It was a great relief, for once, to find familiar friendly faces. I was able to exchange a few pleasantries with them before another friend and SFAS Grand Finalist, Tina Braganza, arrived (with her mom and brother).

From then on out, I had a grand time. We caught up with each others' lives and bonded more than we ever did before. Two other SFAS Grand Finalists (and friends), Genevieve Villabroza and Raymond Manalo, would also drop by our table to chat.

I especially liked the time I had with the girls (Tina, Camille and Jenny). I missed these 3 gals, since we all bonded before the Grand Finals of SFAS.

Jenny was especially sweet as ever. She's just so precious! Iris and I treat her like the baby of the group since we met. After the Grand Finals, Jenny and I were able to communicate only through chats and text messages. But she was always very expressive and very thoughtful. She never failed to express how much she treasures our friendship. She's such a darling! If I'd have another younger sister, I'd like it to be her.

Tina and I were not that close during the Grand Finals of SFAS, but we were friends. She's got a voice that many would kill for. She's also a very pretty young lady. Besides the pleasantries we used to exchange during the Rehearsals, Mall Shows and Tapings of SFAS, we really did not chat a lot. But last Tuesday evening, we made up for all the lost time and bonding of the last 6 months. I found her to be very accomodating, bubbly and lovely person. She engages you in a very animated conversation. She reminded me so much of Iris. We even went on a mission to take a picture of her with her Ultimate Crush, Franco sumthin-sumthin. She made my night a lot of fun!

Camille and I used to talk a lot. She was also Iris' "Twin Sister." They were both funny and nutty! Although Camille was the more silent one, she still had a lot of funky stuff up her sleeve. She also had the best baby talk in the group! For a while, Camille lost touch with most of us. She was kept busy by her band and her studies. For a time there, Iris and I thought that she deliberately hid from us. But during Rachelle's Birthday, it seemed like nothing happened. Although she was a bit silent for a time, she warmed up and joined our little chatter. I missed that old Camille!

Towards the end of the very long program for Rachelle's Debut, we took loads of pictures to remember the event by. We had crazy shots and tons of group pictures. It seemed like we weren't going to see each other for another 5 months! It was pure craziness and fun! I am sure to remember that day for a very long time.

Since Rachelle was extremely busy entertaining her many guests, we were not able to chat with her for a long time. She did, however, take some time away from the maddening crowd to pose for a few pictures with us and exchange some repartees. I wish we would've had a lot more time to chat with Rachelle, but, of course, she had to attend to her other guests.

Right now, I miss all of them... Tina, Camille, Melo, Mon, Shin and Baby Jenny. I miss those times when we used to just hangout in Starbucks (Bayview), or anywhere for that matter, and talk about anything. Of course, I also miss the other SFAS Grand Finalists, Iris, Sweet, Sarah and Jerrianne. It's been like a lifetime since I last saw those kids. I hope the time would come when we would all be able to hang out again.

Now, when would that time be? I wonder...

By the way, I uploaded our pictures from Rachelle's Birthday on my Online Album at Snapfish.com. To view the pictures, just click here.

Sigh... Sigh...

Gay guys really have all the fun! Gosh, darn!

Makes me feel so darn awful to be such an average-looking, single girl!

Why do I say that? Read along...

I've been friggin' single for ALL the 24 years and 355 days that I've been alive on this Earth! Unbelievable? Believe it! It's a very long story, which I can write a separate entry about.

Moving right along...

I have been frustrated for quite some time now, because most of the guys that I am attracted to turn out to be either attached to another girl or they're gay. Sad, but true.

Don't get me wrong, I love gay guys! They make such great friends to straight women. I love talking to them because they are very animated and bubbly. You will never have a dull moment with a gay guy. And as a proof, the Fab 5 of the Queer Eye For The Straight Guy are my heroes!

Anyway, CJ is one of those guys I was initially attracted to here at work. He's a really cute guy. He has a beautiful set of eyes that can light up a room. He also has a very bubbly, warm and perky personality. He will make you feel welcome the first time you meet him. He's also such a fashionista! He's got a great sense of fashion. He's not trendy, but he has a style all his own.

Unfortunately, as I've mentioned, my attraction to CJ will prove to be extremely futile. CJ is gay. He does not look it, but he is. Though I know that CJ will never be straight, I still love him as my friend.

I am soooo envious of CJ. Why? It's because he's got something, or should I say: someone, that I don't... He's got a boyfriend. Not just a boyfriend... He's found his soulmate. And this soulmate of his has made a huge change in CJ. All this in just a span of almost 2 months!!!

CJ met his soulmate over the net in a gay personals site. He was German, one of CJ's "requirements." They exchanged emails, pictures and instant messages. At first glance, you wouldn't think that CJ, nor his boyfriend, were gay, because they are amazingly good-looking. Their attraction to each other was immediate, and as they grew to know one another more, I guess they fell in love.

Just this past week, CJ's boyfriend dropped by the country to visit him. Just in time for his birthday! Most of our co-workers met him, and were immediately smitten. He was a perfect gentleman, and it was quite obvious that he loved CJ a lot. He was every girl's dream boyfriend. He was handsome, sensitive, affectionate, thoughtful and awfully caring. Unfortunately for us, he fancies CJ more than girls! The fact that he was rich, was nothing but an icing on the cake. CJ did not even know that his boyfriend was rich until he got here!

Although I am just so ecstatic and thrilled for CJ, I can't help but feel bad for myself. I know more gay guys who've found great boyfriends, than guys who could be my boyfriend! Makes me wonder: Why is the world so unfair to people like me?!? Sniff, sniff...

Gay guys really do have all the fun!

Happy

One day, you came to me
Freed me from misery
A touch of music in you
You start to feel so happy
Makes me jump up and down
You know my heart skips a beat
Each time that we meet
I am so happy I met you

Happy
I am feeling so happy
I´m gonna be happy
You make me so happy
Can´t you see I´m happy now

--- o O o ---

Those were the First Stanza and Chorus of the Squareheads' song, Happy.

That's exactly how I feel now.

I am contented and happy.

Being happy is a choice I make everyday. I'd rather be happy and carefree than being bogged down by petty things. It's not an easy choice. Sometimes, I have to beat myself up to be happy. But hey! Life seems brighter and more beautiful when you're happy.

Sometimes I wonder why the heck should I be happy?!? Well, there are things in my life that are worth being happy about.

My job is taking turns for the better. I am not getting stressed. I get to learn a lot of things. And... I am doing exceptionally well at work. I even got a couple of Salary Increases in the last month alone! It might not be a glamorous job, like a Marketing or Advertising Executive, or even a Production Designer or Director, but, I am, at least, happily working for one of the biggest Multinational Corporations here in Makati. And my colleagues are like family to me. Everyone is supportive of each other. It's a happy place to be.

My social life is the same. I still enjoy the company of my relatives and some of my friends. I don't just go out on a whim. I stay at home as much as I can. I like spending time in my room, just reading a pocketbook or sleeping. I also cook for my sister. If and when I do go out, I'm usually with cousins, both the very young or those close to my age. I have outgrown the Club scene since my late teenage years to my early 20s.

If there is one thing lacking in my life, it would be a boyfriend. But hey! I am not in a hurry to have one. I am enjoying my Single-Blessedness. No one is jealous of my guy friends. No one checks up on me every hour of the day (except my mom, maybe!). Maybe, if the Lord wills it, I could be even more happier with someone who will rock my world! Hahaha!

But for now, I choose to be happy. I'm gonna be happy.

Can't you see I'm happy now?

Happy Birthday, Mr. Songwriter!

I just wanted to give a shout out to one of the Philippines' Premier Singer/Songwriters, Mr. Ogie Alcasid. It's his birthday today!!!

I have not known Kuya Ogie that long, but in the time I've known him, he has been nothing but thoughtful, kind and sweet. He is definitely the Most Humble Celebrity in the Philippines!

I was not a great big fan of his before I met him. But when I saw how unselfish, down-to-earth and gallant he was, I was taken aback. He really was someone worth looking up to. He did not treat me as a fan or as a supporter. He treated me like a true friend. It's very unlike a celebrity of his stature and calibre.

Where in the Philippines would you find a Celebrity of a Superstar Stature who is so humble and accommodating? And I don't mean "accommodating" in a mall-show, autograph-signing, concert, or press-conference setting. He would talk to you in anywhere. Whether he was tired or not, he would still take time out and even share stories with you.

I've had a lot of encounters with the Songwriter, and I cannot recall a single time when he would be cranky, disrespectful, unfriendly or rude. He's such an All-Around Great Guy! And I know that his family, particularly his wife, Michelle, and his kids are extremely blessed and fortunate to have him in their lives.

Right now, all I can hope and pray for for Kuya Ogie is his continued happiness, good health, fortitude, more blessings, love and success. Oh! And a baby boy! He already has 2 future Ms. Australias (or Ms. Philippines), so I guess a third Herminio Alcasid would not hurt!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, KUYA OGIE! You are such a Godsend!

BLOGGING

This is the first time I am going to write about my experience in Blogging.

I have only recently started Blogging, and so far, I have been slacking. When I started, I had a lot of fun. I had a lot of things running through my mind that I just couldn't wait to share in my BLOG. Now, I couldn't seem to grapple ideas and experiences worth sharing in my BLOG.

I've noticed that some people share poetry in their BLOGs. I used to be artsy-fartsy like that, but I seem to have lost it after College.

Writing poetry required a lot of emotional turmoil on my part to be able to get those creative juices flowing. I had to be in a state of confused emotions and chagrin to be able to get those words out. I expressed myself through poetry when I didn't have any outlet for my frustrations.

Now, I don't seem to have enough angst to write poetry. I also don't find any significant events in my life worth writing poetry about. I guess, I'm more about writing it in prose rather than poetry. I like telling stories and playing with words which hit the point directly. No mind-picking.

Right now, I am quite content with Blogging on my own pace. I don't want to pressure myself in creating or sharing entries. When the inspiration comes, it will come.

Angie

NOTE: Before you get the wrong impression and have any weird thoughts running in your heads, I would just want to clarify that I am Definitely, Absolutely, Catergorically, Indubitably, Doubtlessly, 100% STRAIGHT.

--- o O o ---

If there was Woman in the World that can turn me bisexual or gay, it would definitely be Angelina Jolie.

Who wouldn't be attracted to this dark-haired beauty?!? She has the most beautiful pair of eyes I have ever seen in my life! Those eyes can just penetrate through your very soul. And those full, sexy lips?!? 'Nuff said.

I first saw her in the movie Foxfire. She played the role of a seemingly disturbed stowaway, Margaret "Legs" Sadovsky. I was drawn to her compelling portrayal of this interesting character. It was truly convincing. It even imbedded an impression in my head that she was almost the same person as her character.

After that movie, most of the news I've heard about her pretty much justified the impression I had of her. A rebellious free-spirit. A Bad Girl. An independent woman who was a non-conformist. A woman who exuded mystery, passion and enigma. She was definitely someone who would make you intensely curious.

What really brought about my conclusion that Angelina Jolie would make me gay was, again, her truthful performance on the HBO Movie, Gia. She played the beautiful Gia Marie Carangi. The First Non-Blonde Supermodel. As most people know, Gia had had significant and serious relationships with women. And boy! Did Angelina do justice!!!

Another information that I have learned about Angelina that was really interesting was the she, too, had a relationship with another woman. And that woman was her Foxfire co-star, Jenny Shimizu. That took place was a very long time ago, and she had since been married to (and divorced from) Billy Bob Thornton.

There are still a lot more about Angelina than meets the eye. Her genuine heart and her passion to reach out to those in need are just some of the qualities that makes her more attractive. Her inner beauty shines through her physical pulchritude. That's why she was chosen as Goodwill Ambassador for the United Nations Refugee Agency.

A co-worker and I have agreed that ONLY Angelina Jolie could turn perfectly straight women, like ourselves, into bi-sexual females. (We are still CRAZY about MEN, though!)

The abstruseness and enigma surrounding this breath-takingly stunning and sexy woman is just... Aaarrggghhh!!! It is definitely very hard to explain, but EVERYTHING about Angelina Jolie is simply AMAZING. It just blows my mind! She is the ONLY Woman that would be on the top of my "Most Attractive People" list. Tom Welling, Ashton Kutcher and Gael Garcia Bernal are gonna have a run for their money!!!

Community And Me

I am severely peeved at my father, right now. (Was there ever a time that I wasn't?!?)

Last night, on the way home, we talked about how my brother recently took the Singles' Encounter in San Francisco. I expressed my indifference for taking that said encounter and told him about my estrangement towards engaging into a religious community.

My family has been in a religious community for more than 10 years. My involvement in the community was initally forced by my parents on us, the children. As the years progressed, we found friends in that community and our Saturdays were for Prayer Meetings and what not.

4 or 5 Years into the community, I found myself wanting more out of life. I found that I didn't have a life outside of the community. This frustrated me, incessantly.

When I tried to live life, I felt bound and restricted by the teachings and what-not of the community. Everyone I knew from community, especially my Parents, would start to preach that this and this were "Not of the Lord." That being of the world is not being of the Lord.

In hindsight, there were a number of people in our community who do not live by what they preached. And yet, they look at people with judgement when they find that that person did not live up to the standards and morals of what was taught in community. Brings out the "H" word.

Even some of the people I considered as my friends would look at me with judging eyes, making me feel unworthy of being in the community. This hurt a lot.

Feeling judged and seeing the hypocrisy of it all, I decided to distance myself from the community. Since the thrust of the community was for a more pro-active relationship with God, I chose to have that relationship in a way that is just between me and my God.

Expressing these sentiments to my father last night, he got defensive. Why wouldn't he, I thought to myself, he was one of the hypocrites. He preached, but did not exercise what he exhorted. He said he tried to show us to a better way of life, but he did not display the attributes he supposedly acquired in this "better way of life." He wasn't being a good example to us, so why should I believe that this was the better way. Had he been more true to his being a Renewed Christian, maybe I wouldn't be this way.

He said I was a non-conformist. Was I? I just wanted to be a regular Catholic. A church-going, sacrament-receiving, personal-praying Catholic. Not one who was to confine herself to a more restrictive community. I just want to exercise my relationship with my God in a manner that does not have to been seen by the people around me. Is that wrong?

I am only accountable to my God. When I die, it will not be my earthly father who would judge me... It would be MY GOD.

Weird Weekend

I had the Weirdest Weekend ever!

First off, my "weekend" is not the same as everyone else's. My weekends are Tuesdays and Wednesdays (for the whole month of July). So that's one of the weird facts (except for those who work in Contact Centers and 24/7 Operations).

But, what made my weekend extremely bizarre (at least, for me) was that everything seemed to go wrong!

Last Monday, as I ended work and started my weekend, I found out that my car had been towed! That sucked big time! I was unable to move my car to a Pay Parking area because I was stuck on the phones. I couldn't go out to move the car except during my Lunch hour (which I took at 1:00pm). However, instead of doing so, I had to use my Lunch Hour to pay numerous bills and go to the Bank. So when I finally was able to go down and move it, it was already gone!

Good thing I remembered that one of my Dad's cousins was a Barangay Council Member. I called her up and told her what happened. She agreed to help me, after much lecturing. So I went home on a Shuttle which was, for me, better than driving home.

Early the next morning, I went back to Makati to meet with my Aunt who accompanied me to where the car had been impounded. She gave them the Towing Ticket, which had already been signed by the Barangay Council Chairman. After they checked on my License and Registration, they released the car to me without having to pay the usual PhP1,000 fee.

Everything went on smoothly after that. Or so I thought.

The very next day, Wednesday, I woke to find that we had no running water. I checked on our Pressure Pump, to see if it was turned on. It was not. Usually, if the Pump was off, the water could not be stored in our Overhead Tank. I called my Dad to see if he turned it off. He said that he did because the Pump's motor had been running the whole night and yet there was no water pressure coming in. He had to shut it off or else the fuse might pop. He asked if I had paid the Water bill, to cancel out the possibility that out Water had been disconnected. I had already paid the current water bill, so it was out of the question. Then, I checked the Water Meter outside of our house. It was gone!

I immediately went to the Waterworks Office to ask what had happened. Why our Meter was taken. (They usually take the Water Meter if your service had been disconnected). I told them that I had already paid our bill. The Engineering Department of the Waterworks told me that they had not Disconnected our service and that there have been numerous reports of stolen Water Meters in our area. We have just been victimized by these unscrupulous Meter thieves!

I called my Dad to tell him about what happened. He spoke with one of the Engineers there and asked if we could have our Meter reinstalled in a different area. They made arrangements for the Meter to be replaced and reinstalled, and everything was settled.

That was my Weird Weekend. Well, most of it anyway.

Homecoming

Last night was the BEST! It was just like Christmas and New Year's all over again!

Our family rarely gets together since most of us graduated College. But last night, we had a small get-together when my cousin, Ate Mhin, and her new family (her husband and new baby) came to visit.

Ate Mhin got married last year, and since she and her husband, Ernest, moved to Cainta (near Antipolo), we rarely saw her. So rare, that most of us never even saw her Pregnant!!! And when she gave birth last June, to a healthy baby boy (see my BLOG Entry on our new nephew Matthew), she was so far from where we all lived (about a 5-6 hour drive North of Manila). So, no one from our family really saw this NEW Family, until last night.

They came back to Manila just last week, and we took the opportunity to organize a mini-get-together dinner.

I picked them up straight from work and we headed to our Aunt's house in Parañaque.

When we got there, most of our female relatives were there (our Grandmother, our Aunt and 2 other cousins). Of course, everyone was excited to meet the new baby and greet the proud parents! The house seemed to be in a buzz while everyone marched into the house. Everyone was cautious not to go near the baby if they had coughs or colds, etc.

Slowly, the other relatives arrived. Ate Mhin's dad, Tito Ray, arrived with Ate Mhin's youngest sister, Yan-yan. She's just around 9 or 10 years old. Tito Ray has been looking forward to last night since he learned that we will be having that get-together. He hasn't seen his Grandson since he was born, hence, the excitement.

Then came our other Uncle and Aunt, Tito Dave and Tita Mildred with her mom. Tita Mildred and Tito Dave have been struggling to have a baby since they got married, but they are still holding on to their faith that the Lord will bless them with a Child in HIS time. For the meantime, they are extremely elated about the new addition to the family.

We now have 2 Babies... Izabella Cristina (who is turning 6 years old this year) and Jude Matthew. Izabella is the youngest among the cousins, born with a 15 year gap from her sister, Aissa. She was our "baby" for the longest time, and now, she's the "ATE" of Baby Matthew.

The get-together was rather fun, with everyone hanging out and catching up on each other's lives. Doting on the baby was another highlight of the evening. Most of us, even the usually jealous Izabella, wanted to hang around the baby, watching his every whimper.

As the night progressed, me and another cousin, Mae (Ate Mhin's sister), talked to Ate Mhin about having Matthew.

She told us what she went through while pregnant with him. She said that her neck, armpits, knees and tummy became dark and she had developed stretch marks on her abdomen. While she didn't really have any unusual cravings while pregnant, she said she was quite irritated with her husband. Hahaha! Poor Ernest!

It was quite nice to have the family together like that. Catching up with each other, joking around, talking about politics and food, etc. It would've been more fun if the family was complete. A couple of our cousins were indisposed of (2 were in the US, the other 2 were at work, and yet another was in Laguna) and our other Aunts and Uncles are also in the US.

Oh well, I guess that time will also come soon enough.

Today, they'll be having Lunch together in our Aunt's house again, but unfortunately, I would not be able to go since I have work until 3:00PM. *sigh*

I took a lot of pictures from last night and posted it on Snapfish.com. If you want to view it, just click here.

HELP!!!

I am very agitated right now...

 

I am all alone in the office (in my team's area anyway) and I am in desperate need of moving my car to a more suitable parking spot. Unfortunately, I cannot go anywhere without another person logged in, since there would be no one available to take calls (if there would be any).

 

I am worried that my car would be towed and I would be forced to pay PhP1000. I am so confused right now. I cannot go on break or anything... No one would move my car for me, too! Aggghhh!!!

 

I need help!!!

Easy Vermicelli

About 2 weeks ago, I discovered a new recipe. I learned this recipe in my favorite warehouse club... Price Smart.

 

I was running around Price Smart trying to look after my little cousin, when I saw a free taste booth. Knowing that my cousin loves food, I took her to the booth as we watched the Promo Person prepare a very easy dish. I watched intently, taking mental notes of the cooking process. The simple dish turned out great! We even had seconds!

 

Just this weekend, I tried to cook the same Recipe. I cooked it to suit my taste, and it turned out far better than the one I tried in Price Smart. It was also a hit with my sister. She loved it! It was not dry nor too saucy. It was just right.

 

Now, I decided, since I didn't have much in mind today, I would share this very easy Vermicelli (Sotanghon) Recipe to everyone. It's so easy, you can cook it in less than 20 minutes (excluding the preparation of ingredients).

 

Enjoy!

 

========================================================

 

Easy Vermicelli

 

Ingredients:

Vermicelli Noodles (Sotanghon), soaked in warm water

Carrots, julienned

Baguio Beans, sliced thinly

Cabbage, shredded

Mushrooms, sliced

Sesame Oil (or Butter)

Olive Oil (or any Cooking Oil)

Oyster Sauce

Left-over Shrimp*

Salt and Pepper, to taste

Scrambled Eggs, thinly sliced (Optional)

 

* You may also use Canned Tuna Flakes, Chicken Chunks, Left-over Chicken or Meat as a more Economical Alternative to Shrimp.

 

Procedure:

Cook the Shrimp, Mushrooms, Baguio Beans, Carrots and Cabbage in Olive Oil, making sure that the Carrots are cooked (but not over-cooked). Add salt and pepper according to your taste. Add a teaspoon of Sesame Oil or Butter. Mix well and set aside.

 

Drain the Vermicelli Noodles and place in a wok. Add the Oyster Sauce and toss well until the Oyster Sauce is evenly distributed. Add 1 1/2 teaspoon of Sesame Oil and continue tossing. Mix in the Vegetables and Shrimp.

 

Top with thinly sliced Scrambled Eggs.

 

========================================================

 

Hope you enjoyed the recipe. It's very easy to cook and it smells great too (because of the Sesame Oil). Try it! I swear you won't regret it.

 

More recipes to come, soon!

On Steroids and Asthma

The past few evenings, I've been having Asthma Attacks while asleep. It's so bothersome, that, at times, it prevents me from going to work the next day (to think I have to wake up at 4:45AM). The worst attack was last Monday morning (around 3AM). What made it really worse was the realization that I left my Inhaler in my office drawer. I had no medicine available in the house!!!

I finally decided to go to the Emergency Medical Clinic that afternoon to consult with a Doctor (since my mom was out of the country). The doctor became concerned when I told her that I hardly get any attacks, until these past few evenings. She recommended that I take some medicine to widen my airway before bedtime and some STEROIDS!!!

I was concerned at the sound of Steroids because I know that once you get into steroids, you'll have to maintain it or you'll experience some unwanted side-effects. The doctor, however, assured me that I should not be concerned about the side-effects since the medicine, Medrol (Generic Name: Methylprednisolone), didn't have any, and it was to be taken orally.

At the Clinic, I also took some Ventolin via a Nebulizer. That medication cost me! I had to pay PhP310.00 for it! Good thing I had some cash with me at that time. After that, I had zip!

It was all good, though. I was able to sleep well the next few evenings... Until this morning. I had a slight attack while I tried to sneeze, as I woke up. It eventually faded, but I was still concerned. I just hope that after I take all these medicine, I will be able to sleep comfortably again.

Jeeze!

The other day, I was typing a BLOG entry, but I suddenly had to finish a transaction for a client. When I came back, I couldn't retrieve it anymore! I lost it! Man!!! That sucked!
 
I wanted to re-type it, but I totally forgot what I typed in my entry.
 
As soon as I get inspired, I will try to post another one again...

Sun & Stars

I've never been to a Planetarium.
 
Can you believe it? I'm about 2 months shy of my 25th Birthday and I still have not stepped a foot inside a Planetarium... Ever!
 
I distinctly remember a time when my family was driving by the Rizal Park and I saw the Planetarium. I asked my dad to bring me there, and he said he would. Well, it's been a lifetime (of sorts) since, and I have never even seen the building up close.
 
Most of my friends asked if I'd be willing to take on a stiff neck. Well, I'd be willing to, given that it would truly be an experience. (Not that I'm an Astronomy buff or anything).
 
Living in the City, I have never really learned about the stars, since city lights obscure the night sky. Whenever I watch movies with people looking up at stars, identifying each constellation, etc., I become quite perplexed as to how they manage to identify and find these heavenly bodies.
 
I would really want to be acquainted with the heavens so that I could also navigate around with the stars as my guide.

Anti-Social

I think I am an Anti-Social.

Weird, huh?!? I'm a perky, spirited person, yet I view myself as an Anti-Social.

Why do I think so? Well, let's just say that being a homebody turns you into one. Maybe, it's also because I have set a whole lot of limitations on myself that hinder me from being a Social being. Though I am straining to break free, it seems like I can't.

I have come to this realization months back. It's not that I don't have friends or anything... I have a lot. It's just that, sometimes, I just couldn't relate anymore. It seems like we walk on different planes, with different levels, and I could reach them. This is why I hardly go out on social get-togethers. Catching up has never been my forte. Unless it's on a one-on-one basis.

For example: I've been to 2 get-togethers this past week. The first was a Lunner (Lunch/Dinner) Date with one of my Closest Friends in my professional life. The second was Dinner with 2 of my former "Lambs" just this evening. And all I can say is: I am such a bad company.

Don't get me wrong. I enjoyed the Lunner with my friend, Nabsie. It seemed like we never lost touch (it's been more than a year). We were still making each other crazy. Or at least, I was driving her nuts! Haha! That's the way we've been. Cariño Brutal is the name of the game. I'd always be teasing, and she'd always be the victim. I don't know, but we had a lot of fun. We're just like kids!

The Dinner with my "Lambs" is a whole different story. No offense to Czacza and Lia, but I was at a loss the whole 2 hours we were together. I felt that I did not belong in that table. I can't blame them. It's been roughly 5 years since we've met, and a lot has changed since I got in touch with them last (They've been in touch since). We also have a 2-year age gap, and we run in different circles.

Though I seemed misplaced and disoriented, I was still glad to see them. What's more, is that, I just feel so blessed that these 2 people are still close, despite the fact that they were mere strangers before the YLSS in St. James, which brought us all together in the first place. I felt blessed because, in a way, I became one of the reasons why these 2 became close.

Misplaced. Oblivious. Estranged. Introverted. Austere. Isolated. I feel that a lot lately, especially around friends who I've lost touch with for some time.

Getting plunged into a situation where I am "obliged" to socialize is uncomfortable to me. I feel so vulnerable to my feelings of rejection and dissociation. I feel that the more I engage in a conversation, the more I don't make sense.

Aaarggh!! Somebody help me, please!!!

I Have A Life!!!

I HAVE A LIFE!!!

 

In the past few years, I have let a lot of things (and people) take over my life. Things that, in the long run, did not benefit me well. More often than not, it gave me unbelievable grief. I became very desolate, withdrawn and I even started to secede myself from situations and conversations that had anything to do with the people or things that have burned me in the past. It made me think that, maybe, I didn't have a life beyond those things or people.

 

Then, I proved myself wrong. I did have a life.

 

I don't want to go to specifics as to who or what distressed me in the past, but it certainly made me realize that I was so much better off without them.

 

I started to have a lot of time to be peaceful. I had my mind cleared off of things that I used to think were relevant, which turned out to be quite trivial. I also had a lot more money for myself and for the household expenses. I didn't have to watch out for eggshells in my path, if you know what I mean.

 

I am FREE! I am CAREFREE!!! And, most importantly: I AM HAPPY!!!

 

Given that I don't have much right now, I am still very happy. It may even seem to others like I don't have much of a life... But, at least, I still have one! And I can claim it as MINE!!! No one dictates upon it. No one rules it.

 

Right now, I don't really care what people say or think about me. Who cares, anyway?!? I don't. It's not like I'm losing anything, anyway. Right?!?

 

In my opinion, if you don't feed me, clothe me, pay me, or if you're not related to me... You don't have a goddamn say about how I dress, how I run my life, how I do things, how I talk, how I write or how I friggin' express my ideas.

 

So... BACK OFF!!! I HAVE A LIFE!!! Do you?!?

Congratulations

Just wanted to congratulate my sister, Pam, on her Capping today!!!

My sister is in Nursing School right now (her 2nd degree) and will be going through this ceremony for Nursing Students. It's very much like a graduation ceremony, except that she's not graduating yet. The school officials are going to install my sister into the Nursing world by donning her with a Nurse's cap.

So, Congratulations, Pam!!!

Italian

I LOVE ITALIAN! -- Italian Food, that is! (Got you there! Hehe!)

I actually had Pizza the other day. It was a New York style Pizza: Big, Tasty and Filling! It's so different from the more "commercialized" pizzas that are available in the market. I don't like Pizza Hut or Shakey's Pizza, but I love the ones that come from Sbarro, Yellow Cab and Brooklyn. I could also settle for the Pizza that you can buy at your local Price Smart.

My personal favorite is the White Pizza from Brooklyn. It's a made with different types of White Cheeses. It also has a hint of garlic, which makes it more tastier. Mmmm! Makes my mouth water just thinking about it.

But the Pizza I crave for the most is the Chicken and Garlic Gourmet Pizza from Round Table Pizza. Mmmm! They don't have Round Table Pizzas here in the Philippines, so I'm just dying to have one right about now!

Food has been my passion for some time now. Isn't it obvious? But I am trying to cut it down to a minimum. When I've been good, I reward myself with a slice of Pizza.

Another Italian food that I just LOVE is Pasta. Ravioli. Penne. Fetuccini. Tortellini. Those pasta noodles are more delectible with Authentic Italian Sauces. Puttanesca. Amatricianna. Arrabbiata. Carbonara. Pesto. Aglio e Olio. Neapolitan. Formaggi.

Since I was a kid, I loved spaghetti and lasagna. But until I tried my Aunt's Puttanesca, did I crave for more AUTHENTIC Italian Cuisine. I still, up to this day, have not cooked your usual Spaghetti Sauce (ground meat in tomato sauce). I've been cooking and experimenting with a lot of different sauces to find the perfect taste. Hopefully I can find one that is just perfect.

Now, I'm hungry!!!

Daybreak

At long last! I am now living a NORMAL Life! For a month, at least.

Today, I started my 6:00AM-3:00PM shift at work. It's not THAT Normal for most people, but at least I'm awake when everyone else in this Time Zone is!

It's not that hectic as I presumed it to be, but it is quite interesting.

On my way to work, I saw dawn start to break. The darkness giving way to the light. Poetic! Well, at least to my mind it was. The setting was not romantic. Unless you think the Highway, pothole-ridden streets and towering skyscrapers are romantic, that is.

I haven't seen the sun rise since my carefree teenage years or on Summer Vacations. It's quite a refreshing sight. I just got used to the darkness a lot. Well, it kinda dominated my life for a while. Literally, and figuratively.

I hope that as I see the sun rise on my way to work, I could also feel the light pierce through my dark days.

Headaches. Allergies and Colds

For the last few days, I've had pestering headaches, allergies and colds that have dampened my otherwise satisfying day.

I had already consulted a doctor for my headache, which he has diagnosed to be Vascular in nature. He gave me some prescription drugs to take for 3 days, which, stubbornly, I did not take. My headaches have since subsided, but last night, a heavily pounding headache plagued my evening at work. Fortunately, I was already in the office when my headache started. I took some Mefenamic Acid to numb the pain, and slept it off while at work.

Another ailment that has been bothering me are my allergies. 3/4 of the day, my eyes are raw, itchy, swollen and watery. Almost like conjunctivitis. I try to put some eyedrops to ease the itchiness, but when I wake up, my eyes are still watery and itchy. I've been suffering from this kind of allergy for approximately 5 years now, yet I have not yet adjusted to it. Who would?!?

Having colds, for me, is as common as taking a bath... Literally. Whenever I take a bath, I get colds. Weird, but true. It eventually goes away, but it's always there.

Hmmm... I wonder when that day will come when all these "diseases" leave my body. Hmmm...

On Bacon & Gluttony...

I've been on my Rest Days these past 2 days and the semi-highlight of my "weekend" was food and babysitting.

Ahh, yes... FOOD! Glorious Food! Hot Sausage and Mustard! While we're in the Mood, Cold Jelly and Custard... Wait!!! I'm getting carried away here...

Anyway... On my way home from work last Wednesday morning (June 29), I was famished, not having eaten my dinner and all. Since we were experiencing the last blows of a raging typhoon, I thought it was the perfect weather for some "old fashioned" hot cocoa and some hot pandesal. The perfect breakfast food for an otherwise gloomy and stormy weather. Good thing the bakeshop I buy pandesal from was open early. I bought a couple of freshly baked bread and some milk. Champorado, I thought, would've been more perfect, but then again, I already gave up eating rice (and was too lazy to cook).

When I got home, I proceeded to cook the hot cocoa. Since it was the "old fashioned" one, I had to boil the cocoa and add the milk and sugar ontop of the stove. It was well worth it. I had a great breakfast! Yummy! I also shared it with my dad when he woke up. Unfortunately, my sister had early classes and was already out when I arrived.

I spent most of my Wednesday feeling that I ate a lot! I swear! Gluttony is an ever-present temptation and feeling everytime I go on my Rest Days. Since I don't do much when I'm at home, I just cook up something and eat whatever esculent provision is available. Although I eat moderately in about 1 1/2 times a day, I feel like I've consumed a TON of food, and it sickens me.

Thursday arrived after 14 hours of slumber. You read it accurately... 14 peaceful, accumulated sleeping hours. I felt deprived of sleep the previous day, so I retired to bed early, waking at mid-day. For brunch, I decided to have Bacon and Eggs.

I loved eating Bacon and Eggs. It reminds me of eating at Denny's and IHOP. Whilst cooking the Bacon, the oil that emanated from the Bacon fat splattered onto my right hand. It actually burned 3 spots on the back of my hand. At first, I thought nothing of it, but as I cleaned my hand from the hot oil, I saw 3 separate reddish spots that stung. These reddish spots have since turned into a dark brown color, much like bacon. Now, I think I would rather stick with the other "safer" cold cuts.

Right at this very moment, almost 7 hours after my last meal, I still feel supremely glutted. I can literally feel 5 lbs. adding onto my weight. Hopefully, I am just imagining things.

My life is anticipating normalcy in the next few days, as my new Working Hours are set for the Early Morning and Mid-Afternoon Hours for the month of July. I am looking forward to eating normally, though still in a reasonably moderated fashion.

Reminiscing...

I HATE Reminiscing.

Don't get me wrong, I am a very sentimental person. You'll know by the junk I have at home! Hehehe!

Kidding aside, I AM Sentimental. The thing is, I hate it when I reminisce the days of old.

Why? Because it makes me so sad to think that most of the people I cherished those moments with, are gone. No, they're not DEAD! They just lead different lives now. So different, we don't even get to talk much when we bump into each other. There is just NOTHING in common anymore. And it SUCKS!

I don't think I have changed much. I still enjoy what I have enjoyed in the last 10 years of my life. (Which makes my psychological age, 14 years old). I like watching light-hearted and mainstream movies, Pop/Alternative music, giggling, small chit-chats... Juvenile, I know. I also enjoy just bumming at home, sleeping and watching the tube.

I guess the only thing that changed in me is my desire to be in a more serene, calm, quiet environment. That is the only thing that matured in my personality, among other things.

Most of my "old friends" are either in their final years of Medical School, doing their Residency, working in some uptight office somewhere, having babies or have different friends altogether.

Time is also a factor which separates me from my "old friends." They don't have time, and I have lots of it. It's either that or their schedules don't jive with mine. I would gladly give my time to them, though, if they did the same for me. Unfortunately, that is not the case.

In short, our PRIORITIES have changed a lot. I still have them on my priority list, however, it seems that I have disappeared from theirs. To think I used to consider them as my BEST Friends or my Closest Friends. And that bit is what HURTS the most.

That's why I live my life one day at a time. I keep myself from getting attached to people, in fears of having to suffer the same consequences of my "previous life." I guess the ONLY friend you can ever rely on in your life is YOURSELF. At least, when you look back and reminisce on your times with yourself, you don't get disappointed that you lost that person in one way or another.

This does not mean that I'd throw away all those friendships that I have previously formed. That is not the case. I just think I was the one trashed.

Here's to finding the Diamond in the Rough...

What?!? No Pay?!?

I did something dumb this week.

I forgot to submit my Log Records before the Cut-Off.

I can hear people saying: "So What?!?"

Well, here's the catch. It is office policy to submit your Log Records (Logs In and Out) before each Cut-Off Period (the 9th and 24th of every month), otherwise you do not get your Pay Check for that Pay Period. In short, I will not be receiving my Pay Check at the end of the month.

Ooohhh... Tough!

Well, there is a Logically Sound and Utterly Stupid story behind that.

First, let's do the Logically Sound reason: As I checked my Log Records for this Cut-Off, I realized that my Manager uploaded the wrong schedule, failing to amend the Rest Day Swap that my Co-Worker and I applied for. I also had to apply for a Log Modification, since the system did not Log me out on one of the days.

After my manager did the modifications and necessary adjustments, one of my Logs disappeared! The system deleted it! I immediately informed my Manager and she tried to fix it. She even had to call the System Administrators since it wasn't budging. When it was finally fixed, we were relieved.

Now, the Utterly Stupid reason: I wasn't really myself that evening. My car's brakes almost gave out on me while I was on my way to work. It was raining hard, too. I was dead scared when I got to the office, knowing something might've happened to me if my brakes died. I also wasn't able to get some decent sleep that morning, when I got home.

When it was almost time for me to go home, I was thinking about the car and where we could get the car's brakes fixed. I didn't want to drive that car anywhere without the assurance that it was safe. I waited for my dad to come and pick me up, completely forgetting that I had to submit my Log Records.

To make matters worse, I went on my Rest Days. The Logs were due on a Thursday, and I was on my Day Off! Unfortunately, there are no exemptions to the rule. No Log Records, No Pay. That sucked... BIG TIME!!! And to think I have to pay 3 Bills this month, besides my daily gas, toll and food allowance!

Anyway, I can breathe a little bit easier now since my Manager assured me that the Pay I am supposed to receive at the end of the month will be credited to my July 15 Paycheck. Yipee! Hopefully, I can pay everything up by that time!

Insomniac Extraordinare

That is my occupation on my Friendster account.

Why?

I am not sleep-deprived, nor is it by choice. There is a perfectly logical explanation to it... I work the Graveyard Shift. Well, that is, until July 4th.

I work in one of the biggest Contact Centers here in Makati. I handle the travel concerns of some of the wealthiest people in the Philippines. Calls rarely come during my shift, but it could still screw a person's body clock really bad.

One of the things I really hate about the GY Shift is my Rest Days. Although they may seem longer, it doesn't help my body clock much. It actually adds to my irregular sleeping patterns.

You see, on my Rest Days (which are on Wednesdays and Thursdays), I sleep at the "Regular Time," which is around 10:30PM and wake up at 8:30AM. This screws me up on a Friday, when I have to go to work at 9:00PM. I am awake the whole day of Friday, so when I get to work I am often drowsy or sleepy.

Well, my Co-Workers and I share the same problem. And since we hardly get any calls, we tend to sleep off half of our shifts! Oftentimes, people are surprised that we sleep at work! Not that our manager really minds, she doesn't! As long as we answer the calls that come in, it's fine. It's a nice trade off.

At least, when I drive home from work, I do not feel drowsy or sleepy on the wheel!

I just hope I can get a more Regular shift next time around. July 4, come fast!!!

Jude Matthew Madriaga

Yesterday, June 19, 2004, my cousin gave birth to a 7 pound 11 ounce baby boy who they named Jude Matthew Corpin-Madriaga. He's the long-awaited baby in the family (after my cousin Izabella was born in 1998). The first great-grandchild of my Paternal grandparents.

I was not surprised by his birth since I dreamt of his arrival just 2 days before. In my dream, Ate Mhin (my cousin) gave birth to a very healthy baby boy with a head full of hair, beautiful round eyes and a cheery disposition. When I woke up, I immediately asked my cousin if she already gave birth and told her about my dream. She wished my dream would come true since they were praying for a boy for their first-born. And true enough, they have an adorable baby boy!

The birth of Matthew was not easy for both Matthew and Ate Mhin, though. Matthew's umbilical cord was wrapped around his neck, which prompted the doctors to perform a C-Section on my cousin. It is said that babies born with their umbilical cords around their necks are intelligent and extremely lucky. I hope it's true!

Another cousin (Ate Mhin's brother) sent us a Multimedia Message with a picture of Baby Matthew. He's such a looker! Very much like the baby in my dream. I am looking forward to seeing this little bundle of joy. However, they are staying in La Union (a province in the Northern Luzon) right now, and it will take us around 5 hours to get there.

I know he's going to be a very pampered baby since all of his aunts and uncles just could not wait to dote on him! I hope he grows up a well-mannered, God-fearing and cheerful man.

Hmmm... When would I have a baby of my own?!? Hahaha!

Starting Over

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